Jazz is a 31-year-old gender non-conforming, femme-identified person who uses the pronouns “they” and “theirs”. They describe themselves as black, polyamorous, and pansexual with an active dating life.

The major theme of this episode is gender. Jazz talks about how genitals are not the be-all-end-all of gender. If all of the recent talk about gender as a spectrum has you confused or uncomfortable, this is the episode to listen to!

Here are some of the notable moments they shared with us:

  • 3:55 – Jazz’s “attacks of pleasure” in elementary school
  • 7:45 – Their first time masturbating at age 14
  • 9:40 – How training as a performer left them disembodied and dissociated
  • 13:50 – The emergence of Jazz’s gender non-conforming identity
  • 16:10 – What non-binary means
  • 19:25 – Jazz’s first boyfriend, including a lack of negotiation and advocacy for themselves
  • 24:40 – Discovering vibrators and toys
  • 26:10 – Discovering attraction to multiple kinds of bodies and kissing a girl for the first time
  • 30:20 – Jazz’s defines what “solo-poly” means to them
  • 30:48 – What is a comet partner?
  • 32:00 – Trying out triad relationships
  • 32:56 – How Jazz’s body shape has impacted their experience of sex—not being able to be fully themself because partners have identified them as female
  • 37:00 – Being affirmed in a recent relationship and embracing their chin hair
  • 41:30 – The joys of group sex

The Lowdown:

  • Do you have sex during your period?
  • Can you orgasm from intercourse or strap-on sex alone?
  • Do you prefer the orgasm from masturbation or partnered sex?
  • Have you ever had a threesome or more?
  • Have you ever had public sex?

The Patreon extras for this episode are:

  • At the $5/month level, Jazz talks about their journey to discovering non-monogamy
  • At the $7/month level, that conversation plus the extended Q&A
  • At the $10/month level, all that plus a monthly Ask Me Anything!

Learn more and become a community supporter at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex.

If you like this show, please leave a rating and review at https://ratethispodcast.com/goodgirls

Want to be on the show? Visit www.leahcarey.com/guest and let me know that you’re interested. I’d love to talk with you!

To learn about Sexual Communication Coaching, visit www.leahcarey.com/coaching

Host – Leah Carey (Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, email)

Editor – Gretchen Kilby

Music by – Nazar Rybak